July 7, 2009

Keepin' it Fake I: '90s THROWBACK NIGHT

Keepin' it Fake I
Introducing a new segment on Castaway in which I'll try my darnedest to make you think the Islanders are doing something they're not. I'll be planning full-scale gameday events and offseason promotions with the hopes that it will spark some discussion and get a few laughs.

Today's event:

Go back in time with the Islanders:
The '90s THROWBACK NIGHT!
DISCLAIMER -- I'm fully aware of the Islanders sacrilege I'm about to commit. Please read on:

That's right, dear readers!

Come celebrate a wavy part of your team's history! Break out the ol' teal-navy-orange-white-and-silver's and take a trip to the Coliseum for a Halloween night's timewarp.

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If you're still reading at this point, thank you. I think this makes much more sense than it seems at first, just hear me out.

This upcoming season marks the ever-unlucky thirteenth anniversary of the introduction of that horrid logo and color redesign that shames Islanders fans to this day. It was a full-on "let's not think" decision, and even though the Fisherman years are gone, I say it's about time the team's new leadership acknowledge the blunder in the best possible way:

By revisiting 1996. On ice. In front of 16,234 fans more than ready to see this thirteen-year curse defiantly broken.

Now, I know what you're going to say: "No way. Never again. Not that nightmare." But is it really that embarrassing anymore? Would seeing the Isles suit up in the Fisherman jerseys really be that much worse than seeing your team in these lovelies?

Here's the spin: A Halloween night at the Coliseum, but instead of skanky Ice Girls in skankier-than-usual costumes and half-assed candy giveaways, the entire night is transformed into a thirteen-year timewarp.

The team can take to the ice (for one last time) sporting the Fisherman jerseys, complete with custom socks and helmets, just like the "good" ol' days.

The simpler things like the scoreboard theme and panel colors can be changed to reflect the ever-so-appealing mix of navy, orange, white, teal, and silver.

Whenever the team hits the ice –– pregame or after intermission, and anytime a goal is scored, the PA will, naturally, play Primus' John The Fisherman, which as it happens, is a pretty badass song for a hockey arena to begin with. Have a listen:

Primus - John the Fisherman


And who can forget the all-important goal foghorn! Somehow captured here in all its tacky glory and without crowd cheering (maybe the place was empty?):

The 1996 NYI Fog Horn - complete!

Getting nostalgic yet?

All this, just for one Halloween night event. This is, of course, hinging on the likelihood the Isles are hosting a game that particular Saturday, but you get my point.

You see, it isn't about having a laugh at our absurd past –– that's only part of it. It's another way to make headlines, sell tickets (yes, money, duh), and if I had a say in it, bring some good to a worthy cause: Preserving the Long Island Sound.

It's as simple as could be. 10% (a totally made up amount; I'm sure there's more to it than picking a round number) of all ticket sales for the night would be donated to "Save the Sound", an accomplished and ambitious program under the Connecticut Fund for the Environment. Check them out here.

That way, in keeping with the ...a-hem... nautical theme of the night, a seriously important resource dear to all Long Islanders can share the spotlight(/shame) and get some donations.

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To those of you who'll say it's ridiculous, you're right.

To those of you who will argue it's unnecessary to spend the effort, don't forget that anything that will bring the Isles extra income is good for the program as a whole. And if I remember correctly, if a team uses a "4th" jersey on a one-off basis (like when the Isles introduced their '72 retro uniforms once in 2006)they hold the right to sell those jerseys to their hearts' content. Big bucks.

To those of you who will say this kind of shenanigans has no place in the big leagues, lighten up. It's sport. It's about entertainment and fun. And money.

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For the full tale of the ill-conceived redesign, check out Botta's post from last October.

For a list of achievements by the "Save the Sound" group, click here.


Comments! Let me know how you feel about this. Would you be pumped up for something like this? Or is it yet another fishsticks embarrassment? This one took me a while, so I really appreciate the support.

-Andy

2 comments:

FAUX RUMORS said...

1) Brilliant! The jersey was a mistake, but if the team were a bit more sucessful the negativity associated with the new threads would be a lot less than it was.

The Last One Standing said...

When is keeping it fake II coming?? :)